SHAKTIDefining moments, drawn
Lifelines
On the second day of the diary, each woman was asked to look back on the defining moments that made her who she is. Her lifeline draws those moments in order, from left to right: the line rises for the moments she remembers as high points and falls for the hardest ones. Here are all 46 lifelines in one place. Open any name to read her full story.
Showing 46 of 46 women
Her heights: she drew them Heights follow her own words The middle line: above it the high points, below it the hardest
She drew this curve herself, above and below a line; the heights follow her drawing.
All 9 moments
- 7 · Her mother’s depression
- 9 · The best camping trip with her father
- 10 · Volleyball
- 15 · Soccer
- 22 · An unhealthy relationship
- 23 · A year abroad: “by getting lost, I found myself”
- 28 · Losing her father
- 37 · Her son is born
- 42 · Her daughter is born
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate, from the timeline she drew.
All 7 moments
- About 9 · Learning her mother was seriously ill; growing up fast
- About 14 · Nearly losing her mother; finding her own faith
- About 18 · Graduating, but no diploma
- About 23 · Pride set aside; a GED
- About 26 · A new home found just before her daughter’s birth
- About 28 · Wife, mother and a first home
- 30 (2020) · Vegetarian, homeschooling, work paused
Heights follow her own words. Ages are from the page she wrote.
All 7 moments
- 6 · Her first pet dies
- 8 · Learning to cook a steak for her father
- 18 · A first heartbreak
- 21 · Moving across the country alone
- 30 · Ending an engagement
- 50 · A birthday with old friends
- About 51 (2020) · Ending a toxic relationship; pandemic money stress
Heights follow her own words. Ages are from the timeline she wrote.
All 8 moments
- 10 · Diagnosed with type 1 diabetes
- 14 · A big-city high school: “ok to be me”
- 19 · A pregnancy loss in college; cared for at home
- 24 · Home again; an engagement ended
- 29 · Living alone; laid off
- 34 · A job she loved, underpaid
- 39 · Meeting “a wonderful man”
- 49 · Watching her grandmother fade
Heights follow her own words. Years are generalized.
All 7 moments
- Year 1 · A car accident
- Year 2 · A hidden tumor and two aneurysms found
- Year 2 · Brain surgeries; she makes it through
- Years 2–3 · Learning to live with the scar
- Year 4 · Cleared by her surgeon
- 2019 · Moving across the country for her grandchildren
- 2020 · The pandemic: a check-up postponed, money tight
Heights follow her own words. She gave no dates, so the order is approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · Money tight; teased at school; food as comfort
- Late teens · Starting college, leaving without support
- Undated · A time without a home
- Mid-20s · Her first daughter: “no longer living for myself”
- Late 20s · Her second daughter; health complications; a three-year rut
- Undated · Shaving her head: from “restricted” to “bold”
- 2020 · The pandemic; losing a loved one
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 6 moments
- About 24 · A breakup; back in her mother’s home
- About 26 · Her son is born
- About 27 · A steady job; her own apartment
- About 28 · Pregnant at work, refused help
- About 28–30 · A daughter; a bigger home; parenting mostly alone
- 32 (2020) · The pandemic: work paused, teaching at home
Heights follow her own words. She gave no ages, so the order is approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · A strict home; shyness and anxiety
- Early 20s · Starting her trade; finding her voice
- Early 20s · Five months of travel
- Mid-20s · Becoming a mother
- Mid-20s · Postpartum depression
- Late 20s · Her father’s final months
- Late 20s · Separation; raising two boys on her own
- 31 (2020) · Distance learning; still standing
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 7 moments
- About 15 · From “partying” to becoming a mother
- About 18–19 · Meeting her partner
- About 19 · A pregnancy loss
- About 21 · A second son; moving far from family
- About 24 · Her daughter is born
- 26–27 · Losing a young brother she barely knew
- 27 (2020) · Her mother ill with COVID-19; a wedding ahead
Heights follow her own words. Years are from the timeline she wrote.
All 7 moments
- About 19 · Leaving culinary school for money
- 2016 · A separation; a first cleanse
- 2017 · Losing her grandmother; beginning therapy
- 2018 · Divorce; starting from “$0”
- 2019 · Recognized at work
- 2020 · Furlough, COVID-19, stress illness
- 2020 · 365 miles walked: “the time to think and feel”
Heights follow her own words. She listed her ups and downs without dates, so the order is approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · A home of fresh, careful food
- Adulthood · Moving to the U.S.: gratitude, opportunity
- Years · A painful marriage
- Recent · Her parents leave for her mother’s treatment
- Recent · Hard times with her daughter
- Recent · Counseling; the marriage renewed
- Recent · Her parents return
- 2020 · Her daughter turns 18; learning to let go
Heights follow her own words. Ages are from her own account.
All 8 moments
- 8 · Learning guitar from her father; playing at church
- 16–17 · First jobs; a bad crowd
- 18–20 · A “lost period” away from home
- 20 · Home again; mending trust
- About 22 · Meeting her husband; pregnant; quitting smoking
- 26 · A hurricane flood; losing almost everything
- 27–29 · Three children; “full circle”
- 29 (2020) · A new home she loves; seeking ADHD care
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · Taunted for her family’s heritage
- Teens · Dropping out, then finishing a year of school in three months
- 20s · Motherhood: “the reason I am who I am”
- About 30 · A surgeon’s warning about her mobility
- About 31 · Surgery, and a long, kept weight loss
- 30s · From 20 years of restaurants to a travel job
- 2020 · Leaving a 20-year relationship; home with her parents
- 2020 · A friend’s death; stress eating returns
Heights follow her own words. She drew a flat timeline and marked three moments as her top three; ages are approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · A move to a new city
- Sixth grade · A year of change
- Senior year · “more free than I ever had”
- About 20 · Moving across the country: “the biggest risk”
- Early 20s · Lost jobs, unpaid work, a breakup
- Mid-20s · A contract ends; two new opportunities
- 25 · Losing her grandmother
- 26 (2020) · The pandemic year
Heights follow her own words. She gave no dates, so the order is approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · Her grandmother’s full meals; her mother’s vegetables
- Adulthood · Her mother’s cancer
- Then · Losing two brothers, “back to back”
- Then · High blood pressure: “scary all by itself”
- Later · Learning meditation and quiet time
- Later · Healthier versions of the foods she loves
- 51 (2020) · Keeping up her health for time with family
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 9 moments
- Childhood · Abuse at home, and violence she witnessed
- Childhood summers · Her aunt’s garden and canning
- About 21 · Her first son, born at home
- About 25 · Her second son
- Late 20s · Three and a half years of agoraphobia
- About 30 · Therapy: “I can overcome anything”
- About 41 · Her daughter is born
- 50 (2019) · Her cousin is killed
- 51 (2020) · Illness, a mask and staying home
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 6 moments
- Childhood · Her parents divorce; living with family
- Later · Learning of her father’s substance use
- Young adulthood · Beginning a career in healthcare
- 30 · Eating healthy again; 80 pounds lost
- Recent years · A rough stretch in her personal life
- 33 (2020) · Pandemic strain at work; starting nursing prerequisites
Heights follow her own words. She gave few dates, so the order is approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · The youngest of four; her mother’s fresh food
- Adulthood · Raising her daughter
- Years ago · A lost job as the economy crashed
- Then · Reinventing herself; new work
- Later · Losing a loved one
- Later · Selling her home and buying a new one
- 51 (2020) · Mostly plant-based, working out: “strong and healthy”
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · A traumatic childhood, mostly blocked out
- About 25 · Graduating college alongside her brother
- About 25 · A job and a move: “excited to get my life together”
- About 27 (2014) · Learning about her childhood; a long breakdown
- About 28 · Dog walking and sitting, at her mother’s suggestion
- About 31 (2018) · Therapy and her own business
- About 32 · Her dream house
- 33 (2020) · A move to the country with her dogs
Heights follow her own words. She gave few dates, so ages and order are approximate.
All 7 moments
- Young adulthood · Her son is born: “the best gift ever”
- Soon after · Finishing school as a medical assistant
- Adulthood · Close to her father: “Having a father is so meaningful”
- Later · Forced to move with nowhere to go
- Then · Staying with family; “God made a way”
- Recent · A lost job; three classes short of a certificate
- 41 (2020) · Temporary work from home; jewelry with her daughter
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 6 moments
- Childhood · Talking and listening to music in her mother’s kitchen
- About 23 · Losing her mother suddenly
- Late 20s · Marrying “my new best friend”
- About 39 · Losing her son, age eight, to cancer
- About 40 · Prayer, counseling, and helping other families
- 49 (2020) · A small crafting business: “a Life Saver”
Heights follow her own words. She gave few dates, so ages and order are approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · A lower-middle-class home
- 7 · Her sister is born: “Love for others”
- About 26 · Diagnosed with multiple sclerosis
- Adulthood · A bachelor’s degree while working full time
- About 32 · Adopting her son: “Such a beautiful moment”
- Later · Leaving work sooner than she wanted
- 48 (2020) · Caring for her son and her aging parents
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · Her grandparents’ deli: “the good stuff”
- About 24 · Shut out of the program she wanted
- About 24 · Losing her uncle to cancer
- About 25 · A fresh start at another college
- About 28 (2016) · Graduating, after ten years
- About 30 · Sharing a home with her best friend
- 31 (2019) · Starting anxiety medication: “a solution”
- 32 (2020) · Volunteering against cancer; hoping for a family
Heights follow her own words. She gave few dates, so ages and order are approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · Church, cheerleading, band; summers at her grandmother’s
- About 23 · Losing her father
- About 31 · Her twins; college, thirteen years after high school
- Later · Her husband’s infidelity: “it woke me up”
- About 38 (2013) · Unemployment twice, raising four
- Recent · Reconnecting with a high school flame
- 45 (2020) · Her kids, a job, an apartment, a puppy
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 8 moments
- 19 · A daughter, as a single young mother
- About 23 · Marriage and a move to a small town
- 20s and 30s · Four more children, a house, a business
- About 36 · Twelve years at work, then a supervisor’s role
- About 47 · An extremely hard year deciding to divorce
- 2020 · Divorced; she keeps the family home
- 48 (2020) · Laid off in the pandemic
- 48 · Grandchildren, friends and a new relationship
Heights follow her own words. Ages are worked out from the years she gave.
All 6 moments
- About 14 · Moving in with her sister
- About 28 · Graduating from college
- About 31 · Setting firm travel goals
- About 34 · Losing her mother; surviving a hurricane
- About 42 · Diagnosed with fibromyalgia
- 49 (2020) · Out of work in the pandemic
Heights follow her own words. She gave years, not ages.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · Grandmothers living with diabetes and hypertension
- 2009 · Her first child is born
- 2013 · Her second child is born
- 2018 · A miscarriage
- Before 2020 · Deciding to leave her marriage
- 2020 · A fresh start: “put myself first”
- 2020 · A new kitchen, and a business begun
Heights follow her own words. She named each chapter herself.
All 8 moments
- Struggles · Her parents divorce
- New life · A new school, new cultures
- Womanhood · Finding her own voice
- Independence · College, work, no regrets
- The settlement · Love, a home, marriage
- Magic Love · A baby
- The expansion · Health and family choices
- 2020 · Sorrow: her sister's death
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 6 moments
- Young adulthood · A certificate and a city job: “Accomplished”
- Early 30s · A proposal after eight years together
- About 34 · A daughter, born safely after a risky pregnancy
- About 36 · A son, two years later
- 40 · Losing her aunt, “my second mother”
- 41 (2020) · The pandemic in a one-bedroom apartment
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · Raised by her grandmother
- 13 (1994) · Four months in the U.S., seventh grade
- 23 (2004) · Moving to the U.S.
- 29 (2010) · Losing her grandmother: “the worst”
- 38 (2019) · “A new beginning”
- 39 (2020) · Depression; asking for help
- 39 (2020) · A pregnancy, then a miscarriage
Heights follow her own words. She gave no ages, so the order is approximate.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · A diverse Southern city; travel to family abroad
- Childhood · Going along as her mother cleaned houses
- College · The first in her family to graduate
- Adulthood · Her father’s sudden death
- Before the move · Burnout, a hard relationship, drinking
- About 3 years ago · A move west: “still some fight left in me”
- 2020 · Surgery, then the pandemic
Heights follow her own words. She gave years, not ages.
All 7 moments
- 2008 · A new high school: “reinvent myself”
- 2010 · First time abroad, with a host family
- College · A senior film she could not stop editing
- 2016 · Moving abroad to teach: “by far my biggest influence”
- Abroad · Told she could not be American because she was Black
- 2019 · Home again, starting work in media
- 2020 · Wanting to “fix my relationship with food”
Heights follow her own words.
All 7 moments
- 7 · A new country, a new language
- Middle school · Made to feel she did not belong
- Growing more optimistic; proud of her heritage
- First in her family to finish college
- Her mother takes control of her diabetes
- Buying a house on her own
- 2020 · Busy, tired, a goal to cook
Heights follow her own words, which are few. The order is approximate.
All 7 moments
- Birth · “I was born”
- Childhood · Rice, beans and Latin food; ads between her mother’s soaps
- Adulthood · Her daughter is born
- Ten years · Applying, again and again, to move out
- Adulthood · Moving out at last
- 30 · Turning 30: the weight stays
- 2020 · “Myself , time , covid 19”
Heights follow her own words.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · Raised by a single mother; an uncle who took her everywhere
- An abusive relationship
- Leaving with her daughters
- A better job and a better neighborhood
- Her uncle's sudden death
- A high blood pressure diagnosis
- Three daughters graduate
- 2020 · Workouts with her daughters; saving for a house
Heights follow her own words. She gave few dates, so the order is approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · Parents who encouraged good breakfasts
- College · Her degree
- After college · Her parents divorce
- 1992 · A carjacking at gunpoint, a month before her wedding
- 1992 · Marriage
- After five years of trying · Her son is born: “that wonderful blessing”
- About 2013 · A thyroid diagnosis; daily medicine
- 2020 · Cutting sugar, reading labels
Heights follow her own words.
All 7 moments
- First job · Saving for college, building confidence
- 22 · A daughter; her family disapproves
- Moving out; in control and proud
- Losing her grandfather, “The family glue”
- A move south, far from everyone; depressed
- 30 · A driver's license and a new routine
- 2020 · Two children at home; a garden
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · Her mother’s and grandmother’s cooking
- 16 · Living with her father; running the household
- Adulthood · Marrying her boyfriend of ten years
- Before the first anniversary · Separating, on her own
- After the divorce · “the love of my life”
- Later · A new life together in a new city
- 2019 · A new way of eating; 50 pounds lost
- 2020 · More time at home; routine harder to keep
Heights follow her own words.
All 7 moments
- Childhood · A large family, two languages
- Learning to cook from her grandmother and mother
- Leaving family behind for a new life in the South
- Raising two children; passing on the recipes
- 2020 · A hard year; missing home
- Quarantine · Weight gained at home
- A goal: walking, the gym, a good attitude
Heights follow her own words.
All 8 moments
- Childhood · A caring, thankful family
- Learning her mother's and grandmother's recipes
- Her father's long illness and dialysis
- Finishing high school and college
- Marriage and her first baby
- Losing her father
- Buying a home
- 2020 · Four daughters, a goal to change
Heights follow her own words. She wrote her story as a paragraph; the order is hers, the spacing approximate.
All 6 moments
- First · A new baby, then a diagnosis
- The next years · Depression; pulling inward
- Later · Moving more; “I learned to control it”
- Later · Marrying her teenage love
- Recently · Losing her brother
- Recently · The marriage ends
Heights follow her own words. Ages are from the grid she wrote; one milestone is left out.
All 9 moments
- 5 · Feeling different from other children
- 17 · Leaving school after severe bullying
- 18–19 · Married; her first child
- 23 · A divorce; a second child on the way
- 25 · A GED
- 28 · A professional certificate
- 37 · Her own diagnosis; her mother's illness
- 40 · Finding faith again
- 49 (2020) · Laid off in the pandemic
Heights follow her own words. Ages are approximate, from the timeline she drew.
All 5 moments
- About 17 · Her first daughter; “had to grow up real fast”
- About 26 · Her second daughter
- About 32 · A GED, and a career
- About 33 · Her son
- 35 (2020) · Marrying her husband, a month before the pandemic
Heights follow her own words. She named three high points and one hard one; only the first has an age, and it is approximate.
All 4 moments
- About 29 · Her daughter is born: “a love that I never felt before”
- Losing her grandmother
- Going back to school, for her daughter
- Back with “the love of my life”
Heights follow her own words. She chose only joyful moments: “It was a happy and joyous occasion.”
All 4 moments
- 38 · Her bachelor’s degree
- 39 · A promotion, with more pay
- 42 · Her son graduates and goes to college
- 43 (2020) · Her daughter graduates and goes to college
Heights follow her own words. The first three ages are hers; the rest are approximate.
All 6 moments
- 3 · Her younger sister comes home: her first memory
- 8 · Dancing on stage on New Year’s Eve
- 20 · Her family loses their home; a breakup; her grandmother dies
- After 20 · Starting over, more resilient
- About 25 · Her son is born
- 33 (2020) · A single mother, working and back in school
What the lines share
- 13Children or grandchildren
Yvette, Kiara, Tamara, Nia, Daniela, Marisa, Mariela, Brittany, Leila, Natalia, Monique, Sheila, Adriana
- 14A partner: love, marriage, or an ending
Renee, Nia, Daniela, Marisa, Veronica, Mariela, Brittany, Leila, Natalia, Jill, Monique, Sheila, Simone, Adriana
- 12Illness, her own or a parent's
Yvette, Renee, Kiara, Tamara, Marisa, Veronica, Mariela, Leila, Natalia, Monique, Sheila, Daniela
- 11A move, a home of her own, a fresh start
Yvette, Renee, Kiara, Nia, Daniela, Mariela, Brittany, Jill, Natalia, Simone, Leila
- 10School and work
Kiara, Tamara, Renee, Nia, Marisa, Veronica, Leila, Sheila, Adriana, Simone
- 10The pandemic year
Yvette, Kiara, Tamara, Nia, Daniela, Marisa, Veronica, Jill, Sheila, Simone
- 8The death of someone close
Tamara, Daniela, Marisa, Veronica, Leila, Natalia, Monique, Simone
- 3Food or the body on the line itself
Themes across 17 of these lifelines. A line can carry several themes. On the 14 handwritten timelines that survive, relationships appear on 10, children on 9, illness on 9, and food on 1.
No lifeline matches every filter. Try fewer, or a different word.
These lifelines come from Day 2 of the diary. See all of Day 2 · Your world →